Dealing With Loss… Teaching Your Children About Life And Death - By: Adwina Jackson

At some point or another you and your children will be faced with death.

It’s important that you teach your children that death is merely an aspect of life, and help them become comfortable with the topic.

One of the best things you can do to prepare your children for the prospect of a death is to talk about it with them ahead of time.

Your approach to the subject may vary a little depending on your spiritual beliefs. Some cultures actually embrace the subject of death and see it as an opportunity for re-birth and new life.

It is important that you consider your spiritual and emotional beliefs about death and come to fully embrace them before approaching the topic with your children.

This will help you facilitate a more impacting and clear cut conversation when the time arises to talk about death and dying.

Here are some suggestions for broaching the topic with your children:

Talk With Your Children about the Cycle of Life – Consider discussing death with them at a time that you can naturally incorporate it into part of your conversation. Consider for example when the leaves change colors in the fall, and then die off only to grow back in the spring. Remember to keep things light and easy initially, offering your children ample opportunities to ask questions.

Acknowledge Your Own Feelings – In order for your children to accept death you must first come to terms with it. Children are very sensitive and likely to pick up on your emotional cues about death and dying, thus if you are uncomfortable with the subject they are likely to be too. Take some time to examine your own feelings and become comfortable with the subject before broaching it with your children.

Be Open and Honest about Feelings – Many parents have a natural instinct to shield their children from the grief associated with death, but this can actually be damaging. It is important that you allow your children to understand that death can be sad, and let them know that you are sad if it happens. It is important that children learn to express themselves openly and honesty and learn how to release their emotions when necessary.

Remember when teaching children about death and dying that their initial reactions may be very different from what you would expect.

Rather than focusing on the spiritual or emotional aspects of death they may want to know more about the technicalities, such as how someone is buried and where they go.

Remember that this is perfectly normal. Address each question honestly and age appropriately when they surface, and your children will come to have a healthy understanding of the death and dying process.

About the Author:

Riana Lance writes about health in some publications. Twice a week she informs her health tips and knowledge in a newsletter. Subscribe to get your free twice a week newsletters so you can stay healthy for the rest of your life from Heathifica.com

Source: www.isnare.com

5 Super Effective Tips To Kill Depression - By Kathy Burns-Millyard

Being lonely is a normal part of our everyday lives. We get sad when we fail in our exams, when we're rejected by the person we love, or when someone very close to us passes away.

Depression, however, could be more fatal than just plain loneliness. It could render life-long consequences that could ruin your self-esteem, health, and well-being.

Here are some superb tips to conquer the melancholy mood and get the most bliss out of your daily activities.

1) Get Enough Light and Sunshine.

Lack of exposure to sunlight is responsible for the secretion of the hormone melatonin, which could trigger a dispirited mood and a lethargic condition.

Melatonin is only produced in the dark. It lowers the body temperature and makes you feel sluggish. If you are always cooped up in your room (with the curtains closed), it would be difficult to restrain yourself from staying in bed.

This is the reason why many people are suffering from depression much more often in winter than in the other seasons. It's because the nights are longer.

If you can't afford to get some sunshine, you can always lighten up your room with brighter lights. Have lunch outside the office. Take frequent walks instead of driving your car over short distances.

2) Get Busy. Get Inspired.

You'll be more likely to overcome any feeling of depression if you are too busy to notice it. Live a life full of inspired activities.

Do the things you love. If you're a little short on cash, you could engage in simple stuffs like taking a leisurely stroll in the park, playing sports, reading books, or engaging in any activity that you have passion for and would love to pursue.

Set a goal - a meaningful purpose in life. No matter how difficult or discouraging life can be, remain firm and have an unshakable belief that you are capable of doing anything you desire.

With this kind of positive attitude, you will attain a cheerful disposition to beat the blues.

3) Take a Break.

I mean it.

Listen to soothing music. Soak in a nice warm bath. Ask one of your close friends to massage you. Take a break from your stressful workload and spend the day just goofing around. In other words, have fun.

4) Eat Right and Stay Fit.

Avoid foods with lots of sugar, caffeine, or alcohol. Sugar and caffeine may give you a brief moment of energy; but they would later bring about anxiety , tension, and internal problems. Alcohol is a depressant. Many people would drink alcohol to "forget their problems." They're just aggravating their conditions in the process.

Exercising regularly is a vital depression buster because it allows your body to produce more endorphins than usual. Endorphins are sometimes called "the happy chemicals" because of their stress-reducing and happiness-inducing properties.

5) Get a Social Life.

No man is an island. Your circle of friends are there to give you moral support. Spending time and engaging in worthwhile activities with them could give you a very satisfying feeling. Nothing feels better than having group support.

Never underestimate the power of touch. Doesn't it feel so good when someone pats you on the back and gives you words of encouragement during your most challenging times? Hug or embrace someone today. You'll never know when you have saved another life.

Get intimate. Establish close ties with your family and friends. The love and care expressed by others could tremendously boost your immune system and fend off illnesses. Best of all, you'll live a more secured and happy life.

Want more help with Depression? Read This Online Self Help EBook: "How to Manage and Conquer Depression"

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Kathy_Burns-Millyard

Depression and Experts - By Friedrich Asen

This article is about depression from an unusual perspective. It is about the powerlessness and hopelessness of modern psychological science and research. The importance of an holistic approach to mental and physical health will be explained.

Do you know, what really startled me since I was a child?

It is actually very simple but profound at the same time. I could see that there were problems in the adults' lifes. That was one thing. The other was that they never seemed to really get beyond them. My first assumption about grown ups was that they are really smart people. I mean, they were grown up and I was a kid. You admire them. Anytime they want they can turn on the TV or take the car for a ride, just for fun. They can go to sleep whenever they want or they can stay awake till the morning dawn. They are gods...

My father used to comment on the radio news. From what I could hear I realized that adult people are not what they seem to be. They lacked knowledge, although they heavily pretended to have some. Adults build huge hospitals, but the number of diseased people is increasing. They do a lot of research, but things get worse. They are holding big conferences, but there is no solution to poverty, hunger and pollution. The destruction of the planet continues, unhampered.

They scientifically study the human mind for years, but still they are fighting over minor issues and killing each other. Depression is rampant.

The experts are wearing white coats of authority and they look really impressive. But the picture is deceiving. They are as helpless as the rest. They have been told that depression is caused by some material disfunction in the body. They wouldn't admit it, but this theory is the cause of their own latent or acute depression.

There is one important saying: "Doctor, heal thyself". So, obviously, an expert treating depression in a person should be free of that mental condition himself. But is this really the case? Are our experts examples in their own lives? Have they achieved the peace of mind and the happiness that we are looking for?

To be quite frank: Our mental health experts are haunted by depression themselves.
Of course, their job is demanding and it is hard to stay untouched from all these unfortunate human destinies. But that is no excuse. For a health practitioner it is of prime necessity to become a strong, positive and loving personality. It is not enough to just "know" one's field of "expertise". Life operates on rules that cannot be managed properly just by some theoretical knowledge. A doctor abusing nicotine and alcohol is as unbelievable as a psychologist suffering from a minority complex, being arrogant and insensitive.

People tell me about their experience with mental and physical health practitioners. They feel ignored, misunderstood and treated like an innate object. That's how modern science looks at it's objects: things, which have to be manipulated into proper function. People feel that the experts lack self esteem and hide behind academic degrees and honors. They rightly perceive all this as symptoms of personal weakness. How to develop real trust in such a person?

The formal training in any given area was much less in former times. But that does not mean that we have become advanced. Modern education has created highly trained specialists in their respective fields, but being too much focused on a tiny segment of reality they seem to have lost the whole big picture. At the same time they have lost themselves.

A person is not just ears or heart or mind. A person is an individual being. And what does that mean? A person cannot be divided. A person is one. Treating a depressed person without this consideration will only lead to frustration and more depression.

Depression spreads like wildfire. People seem to get lost in the rat race and the competition. Survival of the fittest. They drown in the struggle for existence. The one and only thing a depressed person needs is unalloyed love and compassion. No one will learn this at university. The students will learn about material processes in the body, in the brain. But they will learn little or nothing about the person possessing the body or brain. In this way they will not learn anything about themselves, too. They will look at depression with the arrogance and helplessness of a lost soul. How should they be able to help?

A psychologist, a coach, a trainer, a priest, a doctor: they all have to understand what life really is. They have to thoroughly understand themselves first. They have to get rid of their own depression and hopelessness deeply buried in themselves. They actually have to become free and independent loving persons. That is the real challenge: How to transform oneself into a great personality. Theoretical knowledge alone is useless.

Friedrich Asen is a spiritual counsellor, coach and author since 20 years. He lives in Austria near Vienna. If you are looking for more quality information about the subject of depression, visit his website http://www.overcome-depression-now.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Friedrich_Asen

Depression-My Story - By Rebecca White

What is depression?

Depression is a serious medical illness; it’s not something that you have made up in your head. It’s more than just feeling "down in the dumps" or "blue" for a few days. It’s feeling "down" and "low" and "hopeless" for weeks at a time.

It is not something you can just pull yourself out of! It is not something that you can just shake off. To read more about the signs and symptoms of depression go to this link:

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/publicat/depression.cfm#ptdep3

For many people one tiny thing can set off a huge depression attack. I have suffered from depression now for 8 years, I guess to be truthful I have dealt with depression my whole life but just didn’t realize it till the incident I am about to relate to you.

8 years ago my husband Brent was in the military, he had been having problems with his health for a little over a year and the doctors all said it was in his head and that they could find nothing wrong with him. Our oldest sons were only 1 ½ and 3 ½ at the time and we lived in Olympia Washington. I kept telling him to get a second opinion but being we had military insurance and at that time it wasn’t as flexible as it is now, he didn’t want to go get a second opinion. We lived in a nice apartment and I love our life, although I was homesick a lot of times it was the life we chose and so I was happy till the incident I will tell you about.

I woke up one morning your typical morning, get up to pack Brent’s lunch and wake him up for PT (physical training) it was 5:30 in the morning. He wasn’t in bed which for him was very unusual but I thought he may have just needed to use the bathroom and I missed him getting out of bed. I walked into the kitchen to start making our morning coffee, and realized that the TV was still on which it shouldn’t have been. I then started looking for Brent I went into the bathroom and found him in a coma on our bathroom floor.

I couldn’t get a response from him and I panicked. I got the boys up threw them in the car and then dragged my husband from our bathroom to our van to get him to the hospital as fast as I could. Now why didn’t I just call the ambulance? To be honest I didn’t think about that all I wanted to do was get him some help.

When we got to the hospital he was still in a coma, the doctors couldn’t figure out why he was non responsive. They pulled me and my sons out of the room he was in and told me to find someone to watch the boys and get back to the hospital as fast as I could and to call his family as they didn’t think he was going to make it.

I was thrown our perfect life, our safe life was in just a few short hours going to change. I can deal with some stress but the thought of losing my best friend was more than I could bare.

We didn’t have a cell phone at that time so I ran with the kids in both my arms to the payphone to call the only friend I had at that time to tell her what was going on, she was getting ready to move in 2 days but she told me to bring my kids to her house and she would watch them.

I then drove the 20 minutes back to our house dropped the kids off at her house ran home and called his parents. During that time I got a phone call from his captain that the doctor had called him to tell him to track me down as my husband was dying and they didn’t think he was going to pull through. I screamed I cried I just didn’t believe this was happening to us!

I got back in the car and smoked cigarettes to try to calm down, we had quit smoking a month before this, my friend had given me her cigarettes while I was at her house. I rushed into the emergency room and the doctor met me out in the hall way and was asking me all sorts of questions of course I didn’t want to take the time to answer I wanted to get back to my hubby, my world, my best friend. The Doctor told me that his sugar levels were 950 and that he really should have died sometime during the night but he was a fighter.

Finally he let me go into the room where Brent was and I leaned over him pleading with him to not leave me, pleading with him not to leave his sons. He opened his eyes and the only thing he said was “I am mad at you, you were smoking” then he went back into his coma. Of course the doctors then pushed me out of the way and started trying to get him to respond to them, they then told me they were taking him to ICU to work on him and get him on a heart catheter.

48 hours later he was awake and was responding to treatment, they had found out that he was a type 1 diabetic although they still don’t understand how he got it since no one in his family has diabetes and and Type 1 is not the kind you get because of your health or your weight you are usually born with it and diagnosed with it while you are still a kid.

After he was released from the hospital after a 7 day stay I lived in constant worry. I could not focus on anything except making sure he was ok, did he eat, did he take his medications. For weeks I could not sleep at night for fear he would have another attack, I still have times where I go through that now.

In an effort to try to calm my fears I started focusing on things in my life that I could control: my weight, the dirty carpets ( we rented so the carpets were very old and had always looked dirty but I was able to live with that till this happened.

I wouldn’t do the dishes, my poor kids were always dirty, the house was a total mess. I mean have you seen those houses that are on tv that Oprah has shown well at one point my house looked like that. I only focused on scrubbing the carpet. I would get up in the morning look at the kitchen try to clean it up and just couldn’t my attention would be drawn to the dirt spot in the carpet by the kitchen entrance. So I would go out to my cleaning closet get out my bucket and scrub brush and start scrubbing that spot. I would still be there scrubbing hours later when Brent came home for lunch.

My poor sons, I love my sons with all my heart but I will admit for the first month Brent was home from the hospital if it hadn’t been for my mom and my MIL they wouldn’t have been clean or fed. I looked at them and didn’t want to deal. When I was scrubbing the carpets I was zoned out to everything! I didn’t think, I didn’t care. This was so not like me!

Finally Brent knew that something was very wrong with me so he made an appointment for me to see a doctor and I was diagnosed with manic depression and OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder). They didn’t want to put me on medication right away they want to try to teach me other ways to focus my fears and obsession with out having to resort to medications. But after a month they realized I needed medicine to help me get through this time of my life.

I hate medicine, I don’t like taking it, I have a hard time remembering to finish the whole dosage. So for me it was a struggle in the beginning to just take the medication. After a few months the medicine helped me get my life back to where I was able to handle it again.

Why do I tell you all this, not sure really. I just know that for me it turned my life upside down over the past 8 years we have several times that I have had to call the EMS to save him, our world has changed. I live in the fear that we will have to go through this again.

When he has episodes I go into a state of worry, depression. I pray that our lives will get back to like they were 12 years ago. No worries living in our own little world where nothing hurts us.

I still go into states of depression but now I know the signs I know when I need to call my doctor and I also know now that for me I cannot pull myself out of it! I now can share with my friends when I am down and have made up a support line of other moms who know me and know that I suffer from depression, who I can call or email when I need that emotional support that sometimes a family member cannot give.

I started Support for Moms in an effort to help other moms who suffer from depression or need a place to go to voice their feelings.

I went through another major depression this past spring and when I reached out for help from an online board that I was at I got booted as a moderator after 3 years of being a moderator on the boards and helping other moms who dealt with depression. They told me it was not because I was depressed but since the day before I had just posted that I needed help, I needed to talk and I posted my soul something I rarely do online or for that matter in person to anyone who is not family. I had a hard time believing it was for any other reason. This made me start searching for a place to post to find someone else who I could talk to who was dealing with what I was dealing with.

So Support for Moms was born!

It is my wish that the site and the boards offer comfort, support for all moms from all walks of life dealing with situations that they have no control over.

So if you are in need of comfort, support or just want to vent and get life’s stresses off your chest please stop by our boards.

Thank you for reading my story and I hope this may help just one person.

Rebecca White http://www.supportformoms.com We proudly encourage interaction in our forums to meet other mothers with similar situations and to make life lasting bonds of genuine friendship. The forum is a comfortable, healing place where you can relate. Tips abound for saving time and money with coupons, rebates, organization and thirty minute dinner ideas. We freely give imaginative ideas guaranteed to keep your children occupied. Our goal is to continually provide the means mothers greatly need to restore their broken wings to make them stronger so they can carry their dreams to their full potential and we will watch them soar.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Rebecca_White

Can Anger Mean I Have Depression ? - By Christopher Ruane

Depression and anxiety is said to be the cause of uncontrolled anger. When a person is constantly worried about things they have no control over it often causes depression. If you feel , there is no hope you can be feeling low.

If you feel that your world is falling apart and you are probably thinking negative, maybe angry and this can lead to depression and anxiety. First, let us take a look at your symptoms. Do you feel like you are going out of your mind? Uncontrolled anger outbursts at any opportunity?

Do you feel like someone is out to get you? Do you think people view you as a crazy person? If you are suffering any one or all of these symptoms or thoughts then you could be in the process of suffering anxiety and depression.

You will probably explode,and your anger bursts. Review all the problem areas carefully to see if there are answers to your problems. Reviewing often opens doors to resources you may have overlooked. If you feel like someone is out to get you then you might have a chemical imbalance or a mental illness.

Why not visit a mental health expert to learn more about your symptoms and find a way to gain control. Anxiety and depression will play tricks with your mind and sometimes your thinking is a result of a chemical imbalance. Remember that most people have their own problems and won't be wondering too much about you!

When you walk into a room and think that people are staring at you, you might want to remember that people observe things around them, doing exactly the same and feeling much the same. When times are difficult it does not mean it is the end of the world although sometimes it may seem this way.

If you are struggling to pay bills, fighting to hold a family together, or having difficulty with your children then remember we all have this problem at some time in our lives. Are your children driving you to angry outbursts ? Take a break, or exercise. This relieves stress that leads to anxiety, depression and anger.

Don not worry about the things you have or do not have control over. If you have problems, the answers are within you. If you are struggling to reach goals then you might want to break your goals down to smaller segments and work slowly to achieve. If you set goals within reason, you will succeed.It is important to pamper your self each day.

Learn some coping relaxation response techniques that benefit both your mind and body. If you feel overwhelmed, you might want to inhale and exhale breaths for up to 10 counts. Curl up on a couch and watching a favorite movie,let your thoughts go.

Focus on what you are doing instead of worrying about what you are not doing. This often clears the mind and helps you to relax. If you subject your self to anger, you will most likely have difficulties for the remaining of your life until you learn to take control of your emotions.

Remember uncontrolled anger can be a sign of depressive illness.

For more related information visit: http://www.DepressionSymptomsTreatment.com - a site that offers advice for avoiding, coping with depression. Get professional knowledge on dealing with symptoms, drug side effects and improving your life!

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Christopher_Ruane

Does A Powerful Self Image Keep Depressive Illness At Bay? Part 2 - By Christopher Ruane

Depressed people feel that they are to be blamed when things go wrong and they’re "just at the right place and at the right time" when things go well. Here’s an exercise to help you realize your value and reduce your feelings of bad luck towards life events that seem to plague you.

Think of a recent memorable event. Describe it. Think about how the contributions of other people, as well as things beyond control, were responsible for this event. List the ways in which your efforts, talents, skills, experience, appearance, etc. were accountable for this event. What rate or percentage of the responsibility/ accountability for this event was attributable to you? Was any of it due to you at all ?

Do this for several events, both positive and negative. You have almost always worked for positive events and against depressing events. So, you can now decide if you aren't causing more positive things than you thought. It is a known fact that depressed people belittle their own abilities.

Ok, if you can see yourself as responsible for negative events -over half of the time - see if others aren't responsible. You will come to realize that your abilities, traits, and contributions can cause good things to happen and that usually external factors beyond your control are explain the negative outcomes.

What does the future hold for me ?

When we are depressed, we have the tendency to concentrate on the past or to see initially the immediate consequences, and not the long-term positive results of what we are doing now. The sufferings in the past can make the depressed people ignore events and circumstances that might be awkward but very critical or rewarding to their future. Become aware of the effects of your internal voice that no one else hears except you by analyzing the outcome of some activity each day.

This is important for us to do, but it is even more essential and difficult for you if you are a pessimistic person with low self-esteem.

Reinfore Yourself as a worthwhile person Some depressed people feel that indulging themselves over rewards for any accomplishment is being egotistic. It is normal to pat yourself in the back once in a while.

Research has shown that whenever we feel down and troubled we tend to do less pleasant activities, but just doing more enjoyable things is not an assurance to beating symptoms of depression. However, actions do change feelings and can steer you away from depressive illness.

You can increase your activity level, find something exciting and worthwhile to engage in. Start with easy tasks, and work up to harder. Reward yourself as you accomplish each task for motivation. It gives you the incentive to keep on trying.

Research also indicates that an aerobic exercise program for at least 30 minutes 3 times a week lessen major depression as much or more than medication. Exercise would be good for you in many ways, not just with depression.
Some studies shows that exercise alone three or five times a week for 30 minutes reduces symptoms of depression by about 50%. That is as good as taking antidepressants or getting psychotherapy treatment. However if you suffer from severe depression this alone will not cure you, but it will help.

Get lots of rest, relaxation, and sleep always. Our personal situation greatly influences your happiness and depression. It has been found that loneliness, dependency, and marital problems often precede an episode of depressive illness.

Try to change your depressing surrounding - working conditions, family relationships, stressful situations, and the like. Our mood reflects our environment.

What to say when you talk to yourself

Reduce the pessimistic and self-criticizing thoughts that characterize depressed people such as:

“I am always a failure.”

“This is a hopeless case.”

“I’m messing up again.”

“It will only get worse.”

To control these depressing thoughts, try restricting sad thoughts to specific times or places. Then reward yourself upon eliminating negative thoughts, and replace them with positive visions every time you have low moods.

Try your best to have a lot more positive thoughts. Be thoughtful – then you will feel that your friends appreciate your efforts. Realize that nothing in this world is insurmountable and that every problem has solutions.

Be happy. Feeling self-satisfaction may help you swing your low mood from sad to happy. Practice smiling more, acting in a more confident manner, dressing up more attractively, expressing compliments, and acting as though the future will be better. Acting and thinking happy thoughts can change your mood and this feeds into your mind.

For more related information visit: http://www.DepressionSymptomsTreatment.com - a site that offers advice for avoiding, coping with depression. Get professional knowledge on dealing with symptoms, drug side effects and improving your life!

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Christopher_Ruane

Does A Powerful Self Image Keep Depressive Illness At Bay ? Part 1 - By Christopher Ruane

A powerful self image comes with a self-control treatment program which consists of the following :

Observe YourselfIn the viewpoint of a depressed person, depression usually seems to come for no apparent reason and from nowhere at all. Research has been clearly presented that positive events or activities lead to positive moods, while negative events lead to depression.

The depressed person should accept that this is so, amidst having depressed feelings out from nowhere. So rate your mood on a subjective 1 to 10 degree and keep a record every day of positive events. It is likely that your mood will be a reflection of what is currently happening in your life.

People with depression symptoms focus more on negative events of their lives and neglect or overlook positive ones.They are not aware of this situation and don't know they are doing this.So, it is for your advantage to know the importance of what is happening in your life everyday.

To do this, you must look for and record all daily events and activities, even little, trivial pleasant ones. It is very important for you to learn again and see the wonderful greatness this world has to offer.

Feel the invigorating atmosphere and smell the flowers. Don't forget usual things like sipping a cup of coffee, assisting someone, taking a walk, watching a bird, reading a book, taking children to school, watching your favorite program, reading an advice column, going shopping, listening to music, making yourself attractive, visiting a friend, completing chores, playing with children, playing sports, expressing an opinion, getting a long kiss, getting or giving a compliment, and the act of smiling. Put this in your record book or so-called diary with a brief description of these pleasant events.

You should observe if your disposition doesn't go up and down according to how many pleasant events occurred that day. If so, this is a motivating push to increase the number of pleasant events and experiences in your life and to appreciate the nice things that happen for each and everyone of us. You may start to view the very negative experiences much less and keep away from the path towards depressive illness and the accompanying symptoms of depression
Using this advice, you can have your simplified version of a "behavioral analysis" in which you would look for the previous situations and consequences of good and bad moods. Your objective in doing this is to find cause and affect relationships that can be used to boost your spirits and reduce depression.

Take One Small Step at a TimeSome depressed people get disappointed when their desire for a better outcome results to disappointments. One main reason is because their expectations overshadow the essential details of how to get there.

Impractical anticipations, like having your grade as all A's, may also lead to frustration and a low self-esteem. Thus, it is important to learn to have a well-defined plan, to set realistic goals and expectations, and to have some success experiences. It is valuable to be satisfied with small rewards and blessings.

Thus, you must make a decision on some practical, possible, important self-help project that will boost your confidence and vitality, such as working out to have a stunning body figure, increased exposure to people, learning to play basketball, spending more time alone with your spouse, or anything for that matter.

Then, for each project goal set many clear and reachable sub-goals (small steps), perhaps things you could do every day. Schedule your time, prioritize your tasks, and do all your best to become successful. Jot down your progress in a diary or record book, along with the positive outcomes.

For more related information visit: http://www.DepressionSymptomsTreatment.com - a site that offers advice for avoiding, coping with depression. Get professional knowledge on dealing with symptoms, drug side effects and improving your life!

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Christopher_Ruane

Dealing With Grief and Loss - How to Mend a Broken Heart - By Maurice Turmel

What is it about Grief & Loss that upsets us so much? Is it the heavy duty emoting that we have to do to get through our suffering? Is it the fear we have about opening ourselves to all this pain? Because, let’s face it, it’s hard down there, in the land of grieving where all those emotions toss us around like a cork on a stormy sea.

We understand that this is necessary, at a surface level, but how we are feeling is what really counts. In that place we call Grief & Loss, is where pain dominates our life and where suffering is the paramount teacher. This is really difficult, and we know it only too well at times like these.

We go there because we have to, but we try hard to escape, as soon as possible.

What is necessary now to get through to the end of this process? Is it simply a matter of toughing it out, or, do we have to dredge and dig and pummel ourselves along the way? It’s hard to be sure what we must do at such times.

All those Gurus that say “do it this way or that way,” are they capable of handling it themselves? As a survivor, going through grief, I would want to know that, wouldn’t you? The essence of false advertising is “never having been there yourself,” is it not? Absolutely, this we all know without a doubt.

So what do we require then to move through this landscape called Grief & Loss? We seem to know this at some level, don’t we? We seem to know that deep down where our sorrows dwell, there is an inescapable reality. We have to feel this. Oh yes, it’s an ugly fact, but true nevertheless. We have to feel this pain in order to exorcise it from our bodies. Yes, we have to feel it, so we can learn that this too is survivable. Isn’t that the most important thing in all such activities – to know where you are at in your own heart when you finally get to the truth?

This truth I talk about is your truth, that feeling in your gut when you know you are right. Since this is your truth, then only You can determine its validity for yourself. No guru can ever take you there. Because deep down, this is your “house,” your well-spring of creative experience.

What happens here defines your life, tells you who you are and, right now, what you have to suffer at times of grief and loss.

To some that may seem sad though, to arrive in this “feeling” place where grief has brought you. But is it really? Perhaps it’s a better thing than you imagined, this place where truth resides within. Perhaps it’s more than you ever bargained for. Sure, grief brought you here, but what else goes on in this place of tender emotion? How about looking around, since you’re already here?

These are your life lessons after all, to have and to hold, until your truths can be borne. How could you ever have a guru do that for you? No such luck! You have to do it yourself. But what a fantastic opportunity to get to know yourself better, to live deep inside your own heart and soul while this grieving process goes on around you.

Let me assure you that you will survive. You will overcome these tragic effects. Because there is truth in there where you live. And that truth will take you somewhere important - for you! This is Your Truth, remember, and only you can assess, experience and benefit from the effects it will have upon you.

So do it! Allow yourself to descend to where it hurts and find out for yourself what this experience of grief and loss is, and what it can teach you that might correct your misperceptions about Life, Love & Purpose. Yes, you have access to the truth, just as I do, just as we all do. As these lessons arrive, they are yours for the taking. We all get them. Grief and Loss are but one more avenue to help us get to our very own Truth. Yes, the suffering will eventually pass, but the Truth – well, that’s forever!

Maurice Turmel PhD is the author of “Parables on Grief & Loss” and “Parables for a Modern Age.” He was a practicing therapist for nearly 25 years, and is now an Author, Speaker and Performing Songwriter, all on the subjects of Personal Growth, Creative Self-Expression and dealing with Grief & Loss. He can be reached at drmoe@mauriceturmel.com or, through his Website at: http://www.mauriceturmel.com

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Depression: The Death Fantasy - By Samantha Weaver

Depression affects 1 in 3 people in the UK and can vary from mild to extremely severe. Having suffered severe depression for the majority of my life, I feel equipped enough to be able to discuss the way the mind works in relation to the topic of depression and death.

At some point while suffering with severe depression, I began to start thinking about death. Death I eventually began to believe as being the only option available to me to rid myself of the pain I was experiencing. Of course, I now know that it is not the only option, but I sincerely believed that it was at the time.

The death fantasy that those who suffer with severe depression begin to experience had pounced on me and was starting to cloud and distort my mind. There wasn’t a day that passed that I wasn’t thinking about death in one way or another. At first, I had simple thoughts. What would my funeral be like? Who would attend it? But over time, these thoughts became more isolated and the questions I began to ask myself started to turn into images in my mind. I could actually picture myself following through with suicide.

I would question how easy it would be to kill myself? Could I just step out off the pavement into the road and in front of oncoming traffic? Could I jump from a bridge? Could I hang myself or poison myself? Which of these methods would be the quickest, the least painful?

Of course, I knew what I was thinking wasn’t right. I knew I should not be torturing myself with this type of thought, but I couldn’t stop myself, I couldn’t help myself and I started to think about things more deeply. How long would it be before someone noticed I wasn’t around? How long would it take for my body to be found?

The worst times were when I was sat alone, at home with nothing on TV, no-one to talk to and no-one around that could distract me or talk some degree of sense back into me. If I went to the kitchen to make a sandwich, I was troubled when I picked a knife out of the cutlery drawer and began considering how I could use it to slit my wrists. I only ever made my sandwich and never became a self-harmer, but the thoughts were there, the death fantasy always lingering in my mind, in my daily routines, ready to pounce on me if things got too tough, if I found I was unable to cope with something. It’s like it became an opt-out ‘option’ there if I needed it.

I started to question if this type of thinking meant that I was crazy? Maybe I wasn’t right in the head; maybe I actually was a loony or a psycho? For certainly any ‘normal person’ wouldn’t be thinking about death, wouldn’t be as fixated on it as me?

Many people think that suicide attempts are a ‘cry for help’ but I can categorically say that they are not necessarily that. Depression distorts the mind so much that all a person can think about is the negativity in their lives and a way out of the pain - death. They hate to feel sad, to feel depressed, to feel as though they are unable to function. No-one that suffers with depression wants to feel the way that they do and it is a very scary thing to find yourself contemplating your own death in your mind.

Thankfully, I managed to get myself into my GP’s practice. But the fear of telling a professional the type of thoughts that you are thinking is huge. I worried that I would be sectioned, worried that I would be thrown into a straight jacket and dismissed as crazy in a mental institution. The courage that I had to find to discuss what was happening in my head was immense. However, it took strength, courage and a strong belief in that I was doing the right thing to help myself.

And the advice I would give anyone else who may be suffering depression and in a similar position to that which I was in is to seek the help, to talk to someone, to try to do something before considering the only option that you think is available to you. Because death isn’t your only option - you can get better and have a life depression free. I am living proof.

Author reserves all rights to this article (c) Samantha C Weaver

Samantha Weaver is the Author of Saving Samantha: A Young Woman's Escape from Childhood Hell, due for release Apr-2006. Find out more at: http://www.samanthaweaver.com

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Bad Habits Can Lead To Stress Related Depression - By Christopher Ruane

When a person has bad habits, you can bet that this person will have stress throughout their lifetime. For example, if a person smokes cigarettes it increases the vitals functioning capabilities, which gradually affects the heart, lungs, and other vital organs.

An autopsy will tell if a person smoked or not when the person is internally evaluated. If the person was, a smoker it will show on the body’s organs and the person’s lungs will be black. Now we know that a person’s internal organs are pinkish and when black is current then problems occurred in the person’s life.

When a person has problems, stress is obviously overwhelming. Likewise, if a person drinks heavily it affects the central nervous system and reduces a person’s ability to cope with stress. Heavy drinkers put their self in harm’s way by destroying the body and potential going to jail in the future.

As you can see, bad habits can cause stress and will cause stress. When a person is born, they are often healthy and if this person avoids bad habits that cause harm then the person’s life will be rewarding. If you are free of chemicals and substances that can cause you harm you will have the ability to make good decisions that offers you a successful future.

Eating too much is also a bad habit that needs to be modified. If a person overeats regularly and avoiding exercise then this person is subject to obesity, heart failure, strokes, diabetes and so forth. We see this causes problems and problems are one of the elements that cause our stress to increase. One of the obvious bad habits that create potential dangers is stress itself.

When a person is lacking the ability to manage his or her life and becomes stress every time an expectation presents itself then this bad habit too can cause harm to the body. Coping means we have the ability to manage our lives successfully without creating stressors that cause our stress to increase.

Minimizing stressors can help us to live a more productive lifestyle and provide us hope when times are hard to deal with. It is never easy to eliminate a bad habit since it is obviously a ritual, but it is possible to work toward reducing and finally eliminating the habits that cause us stress.

If you are use to smoking a cigarette after each meal then tell your self that today you are going to drink water instead of smoking after a meal. If you drink coffee and it opens your smoking cravings up, then start drinking orange juice, milk or some other healthy beverage. If you are a heavy drinker, tell your self every day that you are worth saving.

Sit down and review with your self the many problems you are facing and if some are less severe than others are. If you are often late paying your bills then you know that this is a problem, so you will need to learn and practice paying your bills on time. When you do not pay your bills on time, late charges occur or shut-off notices following.

As you can see, we all cause many of our own problems, which initiate stress. Sitting down and evaluating our situation and decisions can help bring forth rewards by seeing the problems we created and learning how to eliminate the problems in our lives. For example if you are often late for work then you know you have a bad habit that can cost you your job.

You may think that losing your job is not a problem, since someone else will hire you, but loosing your job is not the only problem in the picture. If you continue to adhere to your behaviors by being late for work, you are going to get a bad repetition with businesses.

Business owners talk amongst other owners. Now you can permanent displacement is potential, poverty, potential crime, and so forth. We are adding to the list of problems by ignoring or not accepting that our bad habits are the leading cause of uncontrolled stress. Our decisions are at the top of the list that determines if our stress is overwhelming or not. When behaviors cause stress, it is time to make some changes.

For more related information visit: http://www.DepressionSymptomsTreatment.com - a site that offers advice for avoiding, coping with depression. Get professional knowledge on dealing with symptoms, drug side effects and improving your life!

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Christopher_Ruane

Three Major Factors Causing Depression And Easy Steps To Avoid Them ! - By Christopher Ruane

Although depression is a very common, oft-mentioned disorder, we really need to take a look at what causes depression in the first place.

The factors that contribute to depression are well-known, and well-researched, however what causes it is not yet fully understood.

Recent studies have helped uncover some of the factors that contribute to the likelihood of people developing depression.

Stress

Stress is the all-time great winner of the depression-causing awards. Any stressful environment or situation could lead to depression - social stress, worrying about jobs, problems in relationships, financial worries, staying up late, irregular and uncontrolled lifestyle, pressures of studying and getting good grades. Other events that could cause depression are: death among acquaintances, change of work, moving to a new home, etc.

While these events cannot be avoided, we must come up with an effective stress coping and handling mechanism to be able to thrive even in stressful situation.

Drinking and Drug Use

People who take drugs and alcohol are more predisposed to experiencing depression. When these substances are used at a young age, they can truly have a profound effect on a person’s brain. Although these substances help make the person feel good temporarily, they often become addictive.

Drugs release dopamine within the pleasure center of the brain, just like other pleasurable experiences do. Take this for instance: delicious food boosts dopamine release by about 50 percent. Sex, on the other hand, doubles this number.

However, drugs can increase dopamine release anywhere from four to ten times. This unnatural high almost certainly leads to depression after the high subsides. This cocktail of substance is the surest way to fry brain circuitry.

Drugs make a person depressed more than it makes him happy. This effect will spiral downward until the person doing drugs will want more and more of the substance to break the cycle of depression that follows each high. Thus an addiction is born.

Lack of sleep

Studies show that up to 40 percent of adults do not get the proper amount of sleep per day. And among students, up to 71 percent complain of sleep disorders and lack of sleep.

Sleep is an integral part of a person’s health. During sleep, the body repairs itself and reorganizes thought. Lack of sleep contributes to a lack of coherence in brain waves. This scenario often leads to depression. Sleeping during the day and staying up late also interferes with the body's natural rhythms. This will also lead to a sense of depression.

Here are few ways on how to prevent depression.

Sleep is an integral part of preventing depression. Balance your life with enough rest and exercise everyday. Go for seven to eight hours of sleep per day.

Try to keep some regularity in your life. Keep your activities organized so that they can come at expected and regular intervals. If your weekly, daily or monthly routine is set then your body has time to get used to the activities. This will lead to a reduced chance for depression to set in.

Don't endanger your health by pushing yourself beyond your limits. Keep stress in check and try to avoid stressors if you can. If you cannot, then try to deal with the stressors in a manner that mitigates the damage it may cause.

Sunlight and exercise can help the brain to function a higher level. Be sure to catch some rays in the morning and try to stay active in the daylight when possible.

Keep yourself away from substances such as alcohol and drugs. They may seem attractive at first, but all they really do is cause havoc in a person’s life.

Make at least one warm meal daily a priority. Good eating habits and good health are important when keeping one away from depression.

Have some fun every day. Nothing takes the load off of depression like some good old fun time. Make sure that every day you devote a little time to some simple, natural, healthy fun. Social activities such as chatting, joining a support group sports, and other hobbies can do wonders towards healing a stressed out and busy mind.

Depression can be avoided and treated. And the fun fact is, it can be fun doing so. Follow the above mentioned tips for a sunnier and happier disposition every day. You will look and feel better for it and will never regret not overloading yourself!

For more related information visit: http://www.DepressionSymptomsTreatment.com - a site that offers advice for avoiding, coping with depression. Get professional knowledge on dealing with symptoms, drug side effects and improving your life!

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Christopher_Ruane

Never Lose Hope In Dealing With Your Fears And Depression - By: Stan Popovich

When your fears and depression have the best of you, it is easy to feel that things will not get any better. This is not true. There is much help available in today’s society and the best way to deal with your fears is to find effective ways to overcome them. As a result, here are some techniques a person can use to help manage their fears and anxieties.

You never know when the answers your looking for will come to your doorstep. Even if the thing that you feared does happen, there are circumstances and factors that you can’t predict which can be used to your advantage. These factors can change everything. Remember: we may be ninety-nine percent correct in predicting the future, but all it takes is for that one percent to make a world of difference.

Challenge your negative thinking with positive statements and realistic thinking. When encountering thoughts that make your fearful or depressed, challenge those thoughts by asking yourself questions that will maintain objectivity and common sense. For example, your afraid that if you do not get that job promotion then you will be stuck at your job forever. This depresses you, however your thinking in this situation is unrealistic. The fact of the matter is that there all are kinds of jobs available and just because you don’t get this job promotion doesn’t mean that you will never get one. In addition, people change jobs all the time, and you always have that option of going elsewhere if you are unhappy at your present location.

Some people get depressed and have a difficult time getting out of bed in the mornings. When this happens, a person should take a deep breath and try to find something to do to get their mind off of the problem. A person could take a walk, listen to some music, read the newspaper or do an activity that will give them a fresh perspective on things. Doing something will get your mind off of the problem and give you confidence to do other things.

Seek help from God. You might of heard this before, however have you tried asking God for help? Praying and talking to God about your problem can be effective. Although the answers might not come to you right away, you can’t go wrong on relying on God. You never know how God will work in ones life. All you can do is to do your best each day, hope for the best, and take it in stride by using the help of God. God will help us through our problems if we ask him.

As a Layman and author of an anxiety book, I have done many interviews with various counselors in how to manage fear, anxiety and depression. The techniques that I have just covered are some basic ways to manage your depression, however your best bet is to get some help from a professional and not to lose hope. Eventually, you will find the answers you are looking for.

About the Author:

Stan Popovich is the author of "A Layman's Guide to Managing Fear” an easy to read book that presents a overview of techniques that are effective in managing persistent fears and anxieties. For additional information go to: http://www.managingfear.com

Source: www.isnare.com

When Good People Go Bonkers - By Mark Meshulam

We all go nuts sometimes. Even someone as sublimely well balanced as myself goes off the deep end once in a while.

When this happens, the bizarre behavior of the suddenly wacko can bring damage to themselves, their business relationships, and yes, even their furniture.

Why do we go bananas? Sometimes we allow frustrations to accumulate without releases such as "talking it through", physical activity or masturbation until we boil over.

Sometimes a situation pushes a button in our psyche which releases a gusher of emotion stored from long-ago pain. This eruption can come seemingly from nowhere and usually scares the piss out of everyone in range including the eruptor himself.

At Evanston(IL) Hospital Outpatient Psychiatry, where I spent a six month internship bringing better mental health to scores of afflicted suburbanites, it was openly discussed that more people would flip out during the full moon. I believe the term they used was "we have more patients in crisis". Is this human response to the 28 day lunar cycle the etymology of "looney"?

Perhaps not so coincidently, another 28 day cycle which can bring occasional bouts of wackiness is the so-called female cycle, which is not to be confused with a Vespa motor scooter. This caused some UFO theorists to opine that women might actually be aliens not from Venus as originally believed, but rather from the Moon, come to disrupt the football games and bank accounts of men.

Some say that men have a similar cycle - not to be confused with a Harley Davidson - but men are either too complex, or more likely far too simple and random for a true pattern to emerge.

Whatever the reason, when someone you know goes apeshit, do the following:

1. Get the hell away. People in the throes of a psychotic episode can have superhuman strength. They experience something similar to the legendary adrenalin rush which allows animal activists to lift cars off pinned-down pussy cats, a frequent sight in my neighborhood. Nutcases in full bloom can easily turn your head all the way around - remember Linda Blair in The Exorcist? - by grasping it lightly between thumb and forefinger.

2. Stay the hell away. When a person goes beserk, it can last a few days. During that time he will be manically obsessing about whatever insult or injury they perceived to have happened. He is not negotiable yet; don't even try unless your idea of fun is bashing your head repeatedly into masonry.

3. Watch (from under the desk if necessary) for the real person to return. After such an intense outpouring, Dr. Jekyll will crash from exhaustion. When he emerges, he might be in the sheepish, "What happened?" mode. That is the time for love and support. Try saying, "Wow, you really went through something there, didn't you?" If he says something normal, like "yes", you are making progress. If he snarls or throws his mouse at you, revert to #2 above.

4. Have some sympathy. Remember, you have gone daffy yourself. Remember what it was like. It came from pain, didn't it? That's what happened to your psycho, he had a tsunami of pain. Remembering this will help you be sympathetic. You might need this help if el loco stabbed you in the eye yesterday with a letter opener.

5. Let him talk and offer only gentle guidance. If a person talks enough, he will eventually realize that they got "out of line", but he will need some space in order to realize this. If you offer this insight yourself, especially too early, you might get your hand stapled to your ear.

6. Listening is key. Here's how you do it: Look into the person's eyes with a slightly sad frown. Nod slowly and knowingly after they say each sentence. Resist the urge to offer your wonderful opinion - this part is called "shutting up". Wait until he stops talking. Count to 10. Then say one carefully chosen sentence which is either insightful or encouraging. Repeat until cool.

7. To take lunatic handling to the state of the art, try to get him to analyze the triggering event and why it was so extroardinarily evocative.

8. To really bring it on home, get your nutcase to commit to monitoring his reactions, so that if another triggering event occurs in the future, he will be ready with a better, more adaptive behavior. This might include removing himself from the situation with a planned excuse like, "Pardon me but I must leave this meeting unexpectedly because my dry cleaning is ready."

Mark Meshulam designs productivity software, owns a construction company and holds a masters in Group Dynamics. His articles draw upon 27 years in business. Topics revolve around people and technology at work. Blog: http://www.poingology.com Try his software for free at http://www.poingo.com

Article source: ArticleWorld.net Free Articles

The End of a Relationship Can Be a Terrible Loss- By Dr. Jackie Black

Breaking up, getting divorced and the death of your partner are among the biggest loss events in life.

There are three important things to remember:

1. Grief is the reaction to a loss event;

2. Grieving is the normal, natural, and necessary process that restores us to wholeness;

3. Grieving is a wholly feeling experience.

Grieving is as unique as your fingerprints. No two people will react to the same loss event in the same way and no two people will grieve the same way.

The cognitive or thinking part of self is not the grieving part of self. Think of your personal energy as being 100%. In a perfect world, 50% of your personal energy is your outside self and 50% of your personal energy is your inside self.

The job of the outside self is to think, assess, evaluate, make decisions, go to work, pay your bills, read the paper, plan for your future, remember to send your mother a birthday card; behaviors that occur outside of you.

The job of the inside self is to feel your feelings, be creative, intuitive, inspired, insightful, spiritual, intimate, passionate, joyful, compassionate; experiences that occur inside you.
If you fall down and injure your leg, the blood supply leaves parts of your body and goes to the injured leg to help it heal. You will respect the injury, modify your physical activity, not stress or otherwise re-injure the injured leg, and allow it time to heal.

Similarly, it is correct to think about the injury to your emotions as an emotional rupture. Your normal, natural, and necessary emotional response to an emotional rupture includes shock, numbness, disbelief, anger, sheer terror, and many other feelings and physical body responses.

Much of the energy of your outside self has been redirected inward, to the inside self, much like the blood being directed away from some parts of the physical body and redirected to the injured part of the physical body.

Following a loss, the ratio of outside to inside energy is more like 10% outside self-energy and 90% inside self-energy. A lot of the energy of the outside self has been sent to support the emotional rupture of the inside self.

So, logically that means that thinking, making decisions, going to work, paying your bills, and many of the other daily tasks of the outside self (moving on, getting back to normal) won’t get done anytime soon. There simply isn’t enough outside-self energy at this moment.

It also means you may be feeling fatigued, lack motivation, focus, and concentration…all activities of the outside self. Stop having unrealistic expectations of yourself because a lot of your energy has been redirected from your outside self to your inside self to help heal the emotional rupture and allow your heart time to heal.

Don’t expect that you will return to "business as usual," "move on," "get back to normal," without sufficient time to walk the path of grieving; to give yourself time to restore your sense of safety, regain your sense of balance inside and outside, and reorganize your thinking and coping strategies.

Trust what you know, deep in the place where you know it. Honor your courage and respect the tenderness of your heart and your soul. Tell the truth about your limitations and your vulnerability. They are your strengths! You are the exquisite reflection of your humanness!!

Your reactions are completely normal, natural, and necessary.
Take very good care of you. You deserve it!

Remember, only YOU can make it happen!

Copyright Dr. Jackie Black 1999-2005

If you like this article, please read more about Dr. Jackie’s relationship dating advice and help for issues and problems.

This article may be re-published with appropriate attribution to the author including name, web site, email address and telephone number.

Dr. Jackie is an internationally recognized relationship expert, educator and coach. Advice and coaching about personal relationships is Dr. Jackie's passion. Her goal is to inspire and support single men, single women and couples through the challenges and pitfalls of dating, loving and building lasting, committed relationships in today's fast-paced world. Dr. Jackie's Relationship Coaching Programs and Groups, her Blog, downloadable PodCasts and her Internet streaming radio show are jam-packed with valuable dating tips and strategies.

http://www.DrJackieBlack.com
DrJackie@DrJackieBlack.com
1.888.792.6224

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Depression: is it temporary or not? -

Depression, is it temporary or something that should be treated by a health professional? Be aware of the signs and symptoms, no matter how depressed you are you can recover.

Most everyone at some point and time in their lives suffer depression of some sort. It can range from a minor problem to a major life-threatening illness. For many who seek treatment it can mean a whole new life for them.

With medical science getting closer to understand depression. Major depressions involve an imbalance of the chemical messengers in the brain called neurotransmitters. There are many things that can trigger this imbalance:

*Chronic stresses or a major event in your life

*Major illness can trigger depression

*Reaction to medications

*Genetics can sometimes make someone more susceptible to chemical inbalances.

*Loss of loved ones or loss of something very valuable to you.

Is it just sadness or is it Depression?

Here are a few symptoms that you may experience that could be an indicator that you are depressed. If you experience four of five of these for an extended period of time you may be depressed.

1. A lack of interest or pleasure in activities that you once enjoyed.

2. Insomnia or excessive sleepiness.

3. Low energy, fatigue, tired and sluggish.

4. Feeling restless or irritable and on edge.

5. Feeling worthless or guilty.

6. Inability to concentrate, remember things, or make decisions that normally would not be a problem.

7. Thoughts of suicide.

8. Frequent backaches, neck pain, stomach problems.

9. Increase or decrease in appetite or unexplainable weight loss or gain.

10. Feeling of anxiety or sadness. Feeling of hopelessness.

Consider what might be causing or adding to your depression:

Grief

Grief is the natural process of healing that allows you to adjust to a loss or signifcant change. It can be expressed physically and emotionally and may have the same or similar symptoms of depression. Remember that grieving takes time and take as much time as needed.

*Cry if you want to. Let it all out. Crying is one of our natural stress relievers.

*Talk about it. The more you talk about your loss the better. Seek people that will listen to you. And let your friends know that it is ok to talk about it with you.

Sometimes friends just don't know what to say when it comes to death, they feel awkward and don't want to say anything that might upset you.

Check with your clergy at your church or read books on grief for support and encouragement.

No matter how depressed you are you can recover. Here are a few home-care tips that may help you to get out of your rut. For more serious depression home-care can add to the benefits of professional treatment.

Staying active leaves you less time time to dwell on things. Regular exercise can make you feel physically and mentally better. If it's just a good daily walk, fresh air and the time alone can clear your mind.

Laughter is the best medicine they say. Surround yourself with happy, upbeat people. Positive breeds positive and negative breeds negative.

Believe that this mood will pass and look for signs of it ending.

Boosting your self esteem. Try something new like a hobby or activity. Take a college class:

Knowledge is power for the mind. Again exercise will boost your self-esteem.

Again read books that may help you to get through this hurdle.

Know that if something in your life is just not working it may be a sign to try something new.

When Should You Call A Health Professional?

*If you are feeling suicidal.

*If you suspect you are very depressed.

*If your down time exceeds more than 2 weeks even after you have tried home treatment.

There are many things that can contribute to depression and combining both self-care and professional care may be the most effective.

Never be ashamed to ask for help. This could be a whole new way of life for you that you could be missing out on if you don't ask. The most common form of treatment combines counseling with medication.

Remember life is so wonderful and you deserve to benefit from what it offers.

Source: Pagewise

Keep Being Positive For A Happy Life - By: Steve Hill

I have met many people in my life who are very negative. They moan about seemingly everything and walk around with the weight of the world on their shoulders. I was also like that until the age of twenty-two, at this age I decided to have a new approach to life.

For those first twenty-two years, I was forever feeling sorry for myself. My friends all appeared to have so much more than me, and my life was one long hard struggle, compared to theirs. I was caught up in a web of negativity and needed someone or something to help me to escape.

During an afternoon at work one day, aged as I say twenty-two, a colleague I was working with started to talk to me. What he said was a shock to me, however would have a profound effect on my future. He said to me:

"Your are somebody who always thinks in a negative way, you a right depressive person, aren't you?"

"Am I?"

I said in a shocked voice as I believed I was no different to anybody else. He continued:

"Yes you are. You very rarely smile, you are negative about most issues and you always seem to be carrying the world on your shoulders".

This man was aged around fifty three and continued:

"I used to be like you and then I was given some advice, of which I am now going to relay to you. When you feel down, depressed or sorry for yourself, read the newspapers or watch the news on the television. You may then realise that you are in fact one of the lucky ones."

I had a long think about what he had said. I had never been a big reader or watcher of the news, but decided to give it a go. The advice he gave me was totally correct, the news from around the world and even my own country was quite shocking. I realised that the worries I had were actually quite trivial and that I needed to cherish everyday and start to look on the bright side of life.

Stephen Hill

About the Author:

Stephen Hill has a number of websites including: http://www.stammering-stuttering.co.uk http://www.stress-management-game.co.uk http://www.debt-specialist.co.uk

Source: www.isnare.com

Depression: Escape Your Mental Prison - By: M6.Net Web Hosting

The way out of depression could be in changing the way you perceive the world around you.

There is an illness all around me in modern society that seems to be spreading like the Black Plague once did in Europe so long ago. It's called depression, have you heard of it? Has it affected you? The more I look, the more I see it in so many people in my life, including myself. Depression sucks. It's a real drag, and I mean real drag. It is different from the feelings of unhappiness that all humans have to deal with in their lives. It is being in a solitary prison where you are the only one who can see the walls; you are the jailor, the guard, and the prisoner all rolled into one. Sounds like fun huh? Well, we better become more aware of it because there are certain aspects of contemporary life that are causing more and more souls to lock themselves up, some believing that they have no hope of ever finding the key out.

If you look up depression on the Internet through a Google search query you will find a lot of different ways and means to manage or treat the problem. There are Eastern and Western approaches, psychological and spiritual; today there are 15,400,000 links about the subject. It seems to be on everybody's mind and yet we don't give it the general social awareness that we do for other illnesses. This is probably because there are so many stigmas around faults with the human mind. Broken bones and cancer we can understand or at least think we do; but we touch on a soft spot when we find a problem with that infinitely complex, helpful, magical device we call the brain.

Recently I went to a public talk by a world famous Psychologist named Dorothy Rowe who was selling her new book, 'Depression: The way out of your prison". I'm not going to tell you that she has all the answers, but I did like the different approach that she took to the illness. She's not against modern medication, but she feels that it can be only part of the solution. Of course there are types of intense clinical depression that need certain chemicals to rebalance the brain to a 'normal' working order, but for all depression she feels that the focus could be shifted from a management to a prevention paradigm.

Dr Rowe focuses on the assertion that depression comes when one's structure of interpreting the world around you has been affected by some deeply negative occurrences (usually in one's youth). Her theory suggests that if a certain event happens to one hundred people, they will all probably interpret the experience in an individual, different way; the perceived 'reality' having been a resulting construct from one's life experiences. For example: Let's say you get fired from your job. Just about everyone is going to feel a general unhappiness and grieve over the subsequent period. However, many people have built positive, optimistic ways of seeing life and will just go on and feel as though the layoff was another necessary step or a momentary setback on the way to their life's goals and dreams. "Whatever doesn't kill me, makes me stronger." is a common sentiment from this type of personality.

However, a person who is prone to perceiving the world around them as threatening and dangerous (maybe their parents never gave them positive affirmations as a child, or even put them down emotionally) may believe that the loss of this job is a relative 'destruction' of their world, their safety, their confidence. This is where the illness of depression can dig its sharp teeth in. This is a pretty mellow analogy; in reality some people have gone through hellish childhoods filled with abuse, neglect and addiction. When this type of person then has to deal with the loss of a loved one or relationship break-up, you can imagine that they would be much more prone to perceiving the experience as deeply negative. Dr. Rowe believes that these constructed structures of perceiving what happens to you can be altered, thus giving rise to a new way of seeing reality. The main idea is based around the idea that we must learn to change the ways in which we see ourselves.

If we can learn to accept ourselves with all our faults and imperfections, and realize that if we are doing our best to be a loving and giving person everyday, then we can see ourselves as being worthy, and that all is well. Then if someone else treats us badly, ignores us, or says we aren't good enough, we can know and acknowledge that they are the person with the problem and that we don't necessarily need their affirmation or acceptance. We can then wait for positive people to come into our lives, as like attracts like. Soon enough we will find that there is a group of people that will stand by our side and support us when things get bad because we do the same for ourselves and for them.

One of the most powerful insights I had from this experience was the sheer number of people in the room for Dr. Rowe's speech. Each and every one had been or known someone close who had been depressed at one time in their life, thinking that they were completely alone in the world. When you see a big group of people together whom have all felt alone, you might just see into the true paradox of reality? If everyone who got depressed realized that it is a common occurrence, and connected to others in similar cases, it definitely could be a step towards healing. Could the Internet take a leading role in this process?

About the Author:

Jesse S. Somer, M6.Net (http://www.m6.net), Jesse S. Somer has been locked in a prison of his own mind. The way out was within.

Source: www.isnare.com

Loneliness - By Stephania Munson

Have you ever had one of those dreams -- or call it a nightmare -- where you're in a situation with several other people or even at a party, and no one recognizes you're there? Your dream-self is invisible; you're on the Outside Looking In. You speak, even shout, but no one hears. To the others in the dream, you have no face, no voice, no 'being'.

For some, it's only in their dreams when they can be assertive, have meaningful conversations, exciting adventures, true social interaction. But when they open their eyes and face the day, the feelings of isolation and estrangement begin.

Imagine how it feels, deep within, to believe there's a valid reason no one seeks you out for a friend. After all, you're dull and uninteresting. You're tongue-tied and never know what to say. You may even feel unattractive or ugly. Your self-esteem is non-existent, and just forget Confidence.

Someone actually invites you to a party, but you're hesitant to attend. Mary invited everyone in the office, and she only invited you because she didn't want to be rude. But your name wasn't at the top of her guest list, you're quite sure. So why should you go? Everyone else will be disappointed if you show up. Why spoil the party?

But then you win the days-long battle with yourself, and decide to go to Mary's party. You'll make an appearance. But when no one is friendly, you'll leave early...

Perhaps you've always been shy. As a child, it was hard for you to make friends. Some are lucky enough to be born into families in which social skills are taught and encouraged. And some are not. In fact, some families are so enmeshed and such self-contained units that children can learn by example that Home is the only safe place to be.

Psychologists have conducted research to identify those children whose behaviors reveal inadequate social skills. At recess, such kids may observe other 'popular' children from a distance, without seeming to know how to join the group. Or a little boy might give money to a popular student, or offer to sharpen his pencils for a year, if only he will be his friend. By nature, we are social creatures, and have a deep need to connect with others.

Henry David Thoreau said that being alone is the basic human condition, which may be true. We can't turn to others to imbue or give our life meaning. That must come from within. But psychologist Dan Kiley has coined the phrase 'Living Together Loneliness,' or LTL. Kiley described the stages of LTL as:

(1) a woman married at age 20 to 24, feels bewildered until age 28 to 30; begins to feel isolated;

(2) around age 34, the woman begins to feel impatient, anxious, and/or agitated;

(3) depression sets in at some point between age 43 and 50;

(4) ultimately, the woman may feel chronic bitterness, or unrelieved exhaustion. The 'culprit', in the woman's eyes, is her husband, because he's so self-obsessed, selfish, uncommunicative. For her, it's all his fault because she is so lonely.

Many people remain in unhappy, imperfect marriages (a) without making a shared effort to improve or rebuild the relationship, and/or (b) from the searing fear of breaking all ties and suddenly being alone.

Loneliness can be situational, and may occur when college students are away from home and family for the first time. Most college and university counseling services deal with this issue. And seniors who lose a spouse or live far away from friends and adult children may feel lonely due to the loss or disruption of their previous social network.

But intense loneliness can transmute into depression, and depression to despair. Every 18 minutes, someone in the US commits suicide -- women attempt suicide at three times the rate of males, but males are four times more 'successful' in their attempts. In the past 40 years, suicide by teens and young adults has almost tripled. And for seniors 65 and older, the suicide rate is 50% higher than that of the general population.

In the UK and Ireland, there are 200+ centers offering confidential support for suicidal thoughts, feelings of despair, or distress -- 4.8 million total contacts in 2001. Go to: http://www.samaritans.co.uk/ Or try Haven of Hope Sanctuary Hotline, http://www.mhsanctuary.com/suicide/hotline4.htm Wings of Support is a wonderful service, too: "Whether dealing with a crisis, addiction, coping with a mental disorder, or just feeling overwhelmed with life." Their services are free, and run by caring volunteers: http://www.the-bright-side.org/ Still other sites: http://www.stoploneliness.com/ which encourages you to create a Personal Plan for making positive changes in your life. And you need to visit the courageous, poignant site of Susan Rose Blauner, http://www.howistayedalive.com/ Blauner wrote a guide to suicide prevention, "How I Stayed Alive When My Brain Was Trying to Kill Me."

You're not alone. There are more people who will understand, first-hand, what you're going through than you could ever imagine. Please look in your Yellow Pages, under Crisis/Mental Health/or Emergency. If all else fails, call your local police department, and tell them you are desperate for someone to talk to. Don't go it alone. It hurts too much. Reach out and trust there will be a helping hand in the darkness.

About the Author:

Stephania edits a twice-monthly HTML ezine, Tidbits from the Pantry, that is currently sent to more than 11,000 opt-in subscribers. She recently retired after 40 years in the field of human services, and offers a free evaluation of a life problem to any subscriber by email.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Stephania_Munson

Depression in Teenagers: Now What Can We Do? - By Douglas Cowan, Psy.D.

No doubt you have seen the recent news headlines about a federal panel that recommended to the FDA that anti-depressant medications carry the strongest possible warning label for use in children and teenagers. This recommendation to the FDA shook the medical community, especially those who work with depressed young people. The biggest problem from the treatment community's point of view was not the recommendation for the warning label, but the way that the media protrayed the panel's recommendation.

The panel reported that 2% to 4% of children and teens who were given anti-depressants for the treatment of depression became suicidal, that is they had suicidal thoughts, or made suicidal attempts of one kind or another. None of the 4,000 children and teens studied committed suicide.

What the media did not report well is the fact that 15% of children and teens with depression who receive no treatment will commit suicide. These 15% will not just think about it, but will actually kill themselves.

So what are we to do? If the media had their way it seems that no teens with depression would receive anti-depressants. As a result the suicide rate for those who could be using the medication would rise from nearly zero percent to about fifteen percent. But at least we wouldn't have to be concerned about evil medications.

Look, I understand that there actually are young people, even adults, who have become suicidal only after beginning treatment with an anti-depressant. Some have in fact gone on to take their own lives. This is absolutely tragic. But so is the fact that untreated depression is potentially a fatal disease. Fifteen out of one hundred young people with depression take their own lives. They should be allowed to receive a treatment that will lower the suicide rate dramatically, and without any stigma attached to it by the media.

Recently we had a patient brought to our counseling center named John (not his real name). John was rebellious, angry, withdrawn, and in trouble often, and yet he was diagnosed and treated for depression.

When we think of someone who is depressed, we usually picture a sad, tearful, lonesome person. But teenagers with depression don't look like adults with depression. Current studies show that there are about as many teenagers who are depressed as there are adults that are depressed. However, depression is exhibited far differently by teenagers than by adults. Teenagers do not commonly display gloom, self-depreciation, or talk about feeling hopeless like adults do.

Teenagers with Major Depression are described in diagnostic manuals as often becoming negative and antisocial. Feelings of wanting to leave home, or of not being understoodand approved of increase. The teen often changes, and becomes more restless, grouchy, or aggressive. A reluctance to cooperate in family ventures, and withdrawal from social activities, with retreat to one's room are frequent. School difficulties are likely as concentration is affected. Sometimes there is inattention to personal appearance and increased emotionality. Often there is an increased sensitivity to rejection in love relationships as well.

Teenage boys will often become aggressive, agitated, and get into trouble at home, at school, or with the law. Teenage girls will sometimes become preoccupied with themes of death or dying, and become decreasing concerned about how they look. Suicidal thoughts are common. Some studies suggest that 500,000 teens attempt suicide each year, and 5000 are successful.

Increased use of alcohol or other drugs is common, along with other forms of "self-destructive behaviors." Poor self-esteem is common with teenagers, but especially with those who are depressed.

Parents are often confused and frustrated when their teens begin to act like this. Sometimes parents become stern disciplinarians, or even put the teen down, which only serves to increase feelings of guilt and depression. Other times, parents feel helpless, and stand by waiting for adulthood to arrive. Of course neither course is the right one to take. If you know of a teen whose behaviors have changed to look like what has been described above, let the parents know that there is help available, and encourage the family to seek help from a professional. With proper diagnosis and treatment a depressed teen, or adult, can be greatly helped.

If someone close to you is suffering from depression, first please understand that depression is a very emotionally painful condition. For some people with depression it turns into a "terminal illness" due to suicide. Please take the situation seriously.

1) Get a medical evaluation. Symptoms of depression can be the result of a wide assortment of illnesses, including thyroid problems, viral infections, and other factors.

2) Deprex is an amino acid and homeopathic medicine for the treatment of depression that we have seen work well with our patients. It may be worth trying as long as the situation is "stable" and there is no suicidal thinking on the part of the depressed person.

3) Medications such as Prozac can be very helpful for more difficult cases. Consult your doctor. These medications are often prescribed by Family Practice Doctors, but in most cases ought to be monitored by Psychiatrists.

4) Increase intake of Protein somewhat. Use a protein powder supplement, just like a weight lifter.

5) Exercise daily. Just get out and walk for about 15 minutes.

6) Seek out counseling from someone who is good at treating depression. This can do a world of good for you. However, always use great wisdom and common sense when choosing a therapist. Some are good, and some are not, so choose wisely.

Douglas Cowan, Psy.D., is a family therapist who has been working with ADHD children and their families since 1986. He is the clinical director of the ADHD Information Library's family of seven web sites, including http://www.newideas.net, helping over 350,000 parents and teachers learn more about ADHD each year. Dr. Cowan also serves on the Medical Advisory Board of VAXA International of Tampa, FL., is President of the Board of Directors for KAXL 88.3 FM in central California, and is President of NewIdeas.net Incorporated.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Douglas_Cowan,_Psy.D.

Brighten Up Your Life - Author: John R. Cook, Ph.D.

Do you feel down in the dumps, have less energy and put on a few pounds during the dark, shorter days of winter? You may be suffering from the "winter blues" or a more severe form of the winter blues called Seasonal Affective Disorder or SAD. One in five of us suffers from this problem. Symptoms can include an increase in sleep of up to four hours a day, a serious case of the munchies, and a desire to withdraw, almost like a bear entering hibernation for the winter.

In 60 to 80 percent of cases, the cure for this potentially disabling condition is to make up for the reduced daylight hours in winter through daily exposure to a photo-therapy lamp or SAD light. There are two types of SAD lights to choose from, high intensity and low intensity.

High intensity SAD lights (e.g., Uplift Technologies) are UV-filtered fluorescent lamps with low flicker ballasts that generate light about 20 times brighter than the average home or office. Low intensity SAD lights (e.g., Litebook) use LED arrays to emit blue light. Blue light suppresses the sleep hormone melatonin believed to be involved in causing SAD.

High intensity lamps are used by sitting 12 to 15 inches in front of and slightly below them, with eyes averted downward. Position and distance are less critical with low intensity lights, although it is still important to maintain an unobstructed pathway to your eyes. Carry on eating, reading or writing as you normally would.

Treatment for most people should begin in the fall and continue through till April when the outdoor light is sufficient to provide for their needs. An early start on photo-therapy in the fall can reduce or even prevent symptoms of winter SAD. Exposure periods range from 20 to 45 minutes a day, preferably in the early morning.

Besides its beneficial properties in treating seasonal depressions, bright light can also be helpful with seasonal overeating and weight gain that occur without depressed mood. Some non-seasonal depressions, sleep problems, and effects of jet-lag can also be treated with light therapy. Although side effects are rare, they can include headaches, eye strain, irritability or anxiety, and restlessness.

Before diagnosing yourself with SAD, and running out to buy a SAD light, see your family physician. He or can she tell you if there are any contraindications to using the lights such as eye disease or taking light-sensitive medication. Your physician can also help diagnose medical disorders that masquerade as SAD. These include underactive thyroid function, low blood sugar, and chronic viral infections.

Next, consider renting a lamp for two weeks to find out if the treatment is effective. Although the response rate for high intensity SAD lights is high (less is known about the efficacy of low intensity lights), you could be one of the non-responders. As a final consideration, find a reputable dealer who will allow you to apply the rental payments toward the purchase price.

About the Author:

Dr. Cook is a registered clinical psychologist in the Province of British Columbia (registration 1025), and founder of Aegis Psychological Services Inc.. Find your path to peace and calm through Dr. Cook's home study programs, electronic motivational aids and light therapy products, and self-help links at http://www.FeelBetterSolutions.com.

Article Source: http://www.Marketing-Seek.com

No More Stress, Anxiety, and Depression - By Craig Richard

Nowadays especially in the 21st Century, it is predicted that stress related illnesses such as anxiety and depression will become the biggest killers to human being. Despite significant advances in housing, standards of living, quality of food, and medical science, the pressures all of us have to face in today’s world are as demanding as any pressures experienced by our predecessors.

Why are these illnesses on the rise? And why do some people become so sick through these illnesses, they can find it hard to function?

Well they sure don’t happen overnight! You don’t suddenly wake up one morning and feel stressed or depressed. It is not like flicking on a light switch! And by the same rule, if you’re suffering, you can’t just wake up one morning, flick off the switch and say am I feel better now? Many people who don’t suffer from these illnesses often say to sufferers.

If only it was so easy! Should anyone say this to you, please forgive them as it’s just a lack of understanding. It’s very hard for people to understand how you’re feeling if they haven’t been reach the same level. The fact that these illnesses don’t suddenly happen means we can draw some parallels with illnesses such as heart diseases, some cancers and strokes. Because these illnesses don’t just suddenly happen either.

If we look at heart disease, it’s often the result of damaging behaviors practised over many years. Behaviors such as smoking, lack of exercise and a abnormal diet high in saturated fat. Strokes are a result of similar behaviors and cancers too, specially heavy smoking and drinking as you knew. So how do stressful illnesses such as stress, depression and anxiety compare to?

For many of us, feelings of distress remain constant companions: About 19 million Americans suffer from serious anxiety conditions like obsessive-compulsive disorder and social phobia, reports the National Institute of Mental Health, while virtually everyone else deals with less debilitating but still harmful levels of anxiety.

Stress is also the product of harmful mental habits and behaviors. These habits and behaviors are developed and practised over years since childhood in most of the cases.

Think of it like learning to drive a car. Initially, the skills required to control the vehicle needed conscious thought. It seemed really difficult didn’t it? But once we’re performed them for sufficient periods, we drive as an auto-pilot. We’re mastered the required skills by repetition. Here’re the key: if we eat healthy food, take regular exercise, cut out harmful behaviors such as smoking and drinking, we improve our health and drastically reduce the risk of heart disease, cancer and strokes. We are repeating good habits, habits that will give our physical well being a huge boost.

It’s exactly the same for stress. What’s important to understand is that not everyone becomes stressed or depressed even when tragic and traumatic circumstances happen to them. Just like people who lead a healthy lifestyle and avoid harmful habits and behaviors, people don't become stressed or depressed because they have learned effective habits and behaviors that prevent stress from arising.

This is very good news if you suffer from these illnesses. Because just as we can learn habits and behaviors which cause us to become highly-stressed, depressed or anxious, we can learn the habits and behaviors which stop these terrible illnesses in their tracks. And the more often we make use of them, we’re soon begin to perform them automatically and our mental health will benefit tremendously.

No more feeling stressed out. No more feeling unable to deal with somebody. No more anxiety and no more depression.

I’m living proof of this. For more than 5 years, different kind of traumatic events sent me spiralling into an anxiety-induced depression nightmare. I came out of it by learning the natural skills that starve these illnesses. The more I used them, the less anxious I became. They’re now as natural to me as driving a car, and I am completely eradicated anxiety and depression from my life.

Discover More Click Here for natural Stress, Anxiety, and Depression formulas.
Dr.Craig Richard (Community Health Councils)

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Craig_Richard