How to Find Hope When Hopelessness Attacks - By Melissa Quiter

Often, life can seem very overwhelming. When you are constantly being faced with one challenging situation after another, it can begin to feel exhausting to continue trying. What is the point of constantly fighting back when the only reward is, yet, another challenge to take care of? Hopelessness sets in and the world looks very bleak.

The feelings of hopelessness can be devastating. They can make you do things you wouldn’t normally do and think things you wouldn’t normally think. However, in those moments when the feelings attack you, normal no longer exists. There is only the fight to get through those intense feelings or the fatigue of just finally wanting to succumb to them.

I can so clearly appreciate these feelings. In fact, I know these feelings first hand. I am a survivor of hopelessness. And I choose the word survivor intentionally.

First, I believe that people who prevail in extreme situations are not victims. Victims don’t make it. A victim of a murder is dead. A survivor is someone who says, “I am not done. I am still here and the power is mine to reclaim.”

Second, I chose the word survivor because there were many times, when I really was just as happy, if not happier, with the thought of checking out of this world and calling it done. In my over-worked and over-achieving mind it seemed to make sense that, if I wasn’t finding a purpose and had no happiness, what was the point in pushing through all this pain and struggle and fear?

The amazing thing is that I am still here. I discovered the answers that I so desperately needed, and now I want to share those answers with others who also know there is so much more than that what you may be experiencing.

Although I don’t know you personally, I do know this. Up to this point, you have pushed through too. Regardless of the strength and will it has taken to do so, you have not given up. And, the even more amazing thing I know is that you are now taking an active role in creating a different future than you have experienced in the past. You are doing that by reading this article. The only way to create something different from what you have already experienced is to add new information, new tools and new resources to your life.

What I discovered that changed my life, and will change yours too, is that without tools, humans would stop growing and evolving. There is no world, as you and I know it, without the tools we use to live on a daily basis. If you think about it then, it makes perfect sense that being the creator of an amazing, joyous, productive and fulfilling life also requires the proper tools. You cannot do this alone. You aren’t supposed to do it alone! And what is so exciting is that -- even though you have been struggling and pushing and scraping by without all the tools -- you are still here and still making it. Think of what is going to be possible when you do have the proper tools. You won’t believe how much more fun this thing called life can be!

The tools that I teach are the tools that I discovered, modified and combined to deal with my own dire need to find the missing joy and purpose I knew was possible. I knew there had to be a better way than constant struggle.

Tools are what set humans free. Through the use of tools, you can write, cook, create music, build homes, drive, fly and achieve feats never before thought possible. Tools are what allow humans to be more than they could otherwise be. Even research into our animal kingdom shows the use of tools is prevalent for daily survival.

It only makes sense that in order to create a life that you most desire, you must have knowledge and access to the tools of creating and manifesting. Through extensive research and trial and error on my own journey, the following combination of tools is what I found to be the key to living and creating the life you desire.

First, the foundation of creating is based on understanding the general principles of how the world works. The Universal Laws provide this foundation from a spiritual and scientific combined perspective. There are seven universal laws with one overriding law that governs every experience you have. The overriding law is based on Quantum Physics, and is says that everything is made of energy. Everything. From the chair you sit in to the thought you have about the chair to the feelings you get when you sit in the chair. All physical and non-physical “things” are simply varying speeds of energy in varying forms creating the world in which you and I live. By understanding and applying each universal law, you open your mind up to the multiple options for what is actually possible.

For example, if you were to fly a plane, but you had no understanding of the laws of gravity and aerodynamics, flying the plane would, in theory, still be possible. You could get behind the controls and hit the gas. However, you would most likely not have a pleasant or safe flight. You certainly wouldn’t experience the joy and ease of flying and the truly amazing experience you could have if you had the proper tools and knowledge to assist in that endeavor.

Closely related to the foundational tool of the Universal Laws is the Law of Attraction. The Law of Attraction applies the theory of all “things” being made of energy and explains how creating and manifesting is based on focusing and attracting. This law states that whatever you place your energy and focus on is what you attract back to you – wanted or unwanted. This means that by learning to focus on what you do want versus what you don’t want, you have access to attracting every desire you articulate. For example, if you desire to have a safe trip home. You must focus your energy on the safe trip as opposed to focusing on not having an accident. When you focus on not having something, you are actually still putting your focus on that thing you don’t want – in this example the accident.

The challenge with this tool is that is requires the use of three other imperative tools in order for it to work with 100% success. Many people have been frustrated with the Law of Attraction not working, thinking it is flawed. However, I found that it is not the law that is flawed, but the application of the law without the other tools. Just like a hammer is an amazing tool for building, but only if it is combined with a nail. Without the nail, the hammer is extremely limited in its full capacity. The same is true for the nail! Learning and knowing the Law of Attraction is imperative to being a master creator of your life.

One of the tools required to apply the Law of Attraction is the tool of self-awareness. This is a tool that is often under appreciated and taken for granted. Truly understanding where you are right now in your life, why you are there and, most importantly, how you got there is imperative to knowing where you want to go, why and how you plan to get there. The tool of truly understanding yourself is not always as easy as it appears. This is why there are multiple tools for getting a closer look at who you really are. These tools include the 4-eVer evolving! Life Assessment, the Gallup Poll’s StrengthFinder™ and delving into your past to discover passions, patterns and themes. Without knowing where you are starting, you cannot know in which direction you need to go to get to your destination. You also may not truly understand your destination. When you know where you are starting, what is pulling you forward and exactly where you want to go, the plan for that journey naturally unfolds before you. You cannot create and manifest without an articulated plan.

One of the most important tools needed to create your plan is the Nine Environments of Holistic Living. Your life does not only consist of one area in which you create your experiences from. There are multiple areas of importance that, at varying times, get more or less focus. By using the Nine Environments of Holistic Living, you can break down your life into manageable segments. When you start articulating your goals and desires in each of the separate areas, you quickly find where there may be conflicting intentions occurring. And this is where so much of the hopelessness and frustration is caused.

Conflicting intentions are two desires that, if realized, actually cancel each other out. If you have conflicting intentions that you are not aware of, you often end up not creating either one, or you get a very watered-down version of one or the other. The worst thing that can happen is that you get the opposite of what you intended for both desires creating havoc and chaos in your life.

The best tool I have found to work with the Nine Environments of Holistic Living is Neuro-Linguistic Programming – otherwise known as NLP. NLP is an advanced form of communication that not only improves communication between people, but also opens up communication with all the parts of your subconscious mind. NLP is a tool that allows you to go beyond your conscious into your subconscious mind, where your behaviors and beliefs are formed. It takes you to the source. And, it is only at the source that anything can be affected and changed for long-term growth and evolution. NLP provides multiple exercises and techniques that allow you to determine exactly what is happening within all the various parts of you. Without an understanding of the largest segment of your mind, reported to make up 88%, you cannot possible focus on the destination you most want to manifest. Without proper focus, you attract more of what you don’t want, and forgo creating and manifesting what you do want.

The last tool I created to pull everything together. The Process of Deliberate Creation is a daily tool that uses the information uncovered and discovered in creating your plan to assist in applying the proper focus needed on a daily basis. If you are not creating deliberately, it is too easy to fall into default creating. Default creating is not knowing what you desire in each area of your life. It is not knowing what conflicting intentions may be sabotaging your progress and success and producing hopelessness and sadness. Default creating is not using the Universal Laws to assist in reframing what you see and ultimately what you experience. Deliberate creation is about combining all of these tools and giving yourself the gift of hope; giving yourself the gift of living the life you came here to live.

Deliberate creation is about being a survivor without the struggle, sadness and hopelessness. It is about immediately knowing how to shift every situation and challenge to propel you forward. It is about shifting your mindset to see the possibilities instead of the blocks. It is about having the proper tools to create and manifest for building the life of your dreams, painting the masterpiece of your imagination and making music that fills your soul.

Creating and manifesting is about becoming aware of the tools, which you have done in this article, and learning how to use those tools to begin living your life as a survivor of hopelessness. I did it and I know, with the combination of these tools, you can too!

Melissa Jean Quiter is an inspirational life and business strategist with Provocative Communications. She is the author of the 4-phase, life and business-changing program, “Being Spiritual Doesn’t Mean Being Poor! How to remove what blocks you from making money & creating happiness,” based on the Law of Attraction and the three required elements (the universal laws, Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the Nine Environments of Holistic Living) to ensure your success 100% of the time. To get started, visit: http://www.ProvocativeCommunications.com/takingcontrol.html .

Melissa also teaches a simple, yet profound, daily process for deliberately creating your life in her book, “My cat made me a millionaire… (and how yours can too!),” available here: http://www.ProvocativeCommunications.com/cat.html . E-mail: Quiter@Texas.net or call: [512] 341-0556.

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